Not only is my God enough, He's more than enough!

Last week I had a dry spell in my donations. Then a friend of mine called me and asked me, and left a message wanting to know if he could borrow some money, because a few of his clients had backed out on him. I did not know if I had the money to help him or not. With my up and coming missions to Africa, needing to pay my rent before I leave, along with the fact that I may need to move when I get back from Africa, how could I help him out. So I prayed about it, with the thought that kept popping in my head, "If you can not afford to loose the money, then you can not afford to lend the money!” After I had prayed about it, I went home and took a shower and went to sleep. When I woke the next morning, I had 2 missed calls on my phone, along with a voice mail. It was my friend calling me saying that he was sorry for putting his burden on me, and just forget about what he had said. So I did just that, but there was a feeling that the rest of my donations were tied up with lending the money to my friend.

A day earlier I was talking to some friends at work, and told them about the process of the trip, and that the enemy was throwing some things at us and I said them, "devil, is that all you got", well that opened up a door for a challenge that laid before me.

That following Saturday there were no donations coming in. none at all. I began to worry. I tried to send out as many letters as possible to raise the money, and nothing was happening. I began to worry more and get stressed out. I tried to remind myself of what God had asked me earlier, and that was, "Am I faithful?” but the thoughts that kept coming of no money coming in, kept telling me that I was not going to go this time around, and that I should call it off. You talk about heartbreak. Oh! Just to thing about that just gave me the nastiest feeling in my gut, but I continued on believing that God had called me to go on this trip.

That Sunday a memory popped in my mind of when I was a child spending the summer with my father, and I had asked him if he would retrieve my Hot Wheels from my grandparent’s house. He agreed that he would do it. That night my stepbrother told me as we were going to bed, "daddy is not going to get your Hot Wheels tomorrow. He told me." As a nine-year-old child I began to panic. Oh no! Why would he do that? So that morning I woke up early to catch my father to see why he was not going to get my Hot Wheels? I got into some trouble that morning for being up so early. I don't know why, but I asked my dad why he said that he was not going to get my Hot Wheels and that Mark told me that he was not. My father woke up my stepbrother and asked him. Mark told him that he did not say that. The fear of a nine year old just turned to anger. Anger, because my stepbrother just lied to protect himself. Well the whole thing ended that morning and I got my Hot Wheels that afternoon.

I applied this memory to what was going on at the moment with the fund raising, and the mission trip, but still, the thought of not going due to the fact that I did not have the money still rang as truth. It was almost as if I were in the middle of a spiritual battle. Is God faithful like He said? Is He going to come through in the end? Each question was answered with a doubt. I begin to wonder if I had made a mistake not lending out the money that my friend needed. So I prayed about it. I prayed that if it were true, then out of God's amazing grace would grant me another opportunity to help, if not him, then someone else. Along with this, the struggle to believe that I was going continued. I went to work that night, and worked hard. Told one friend about what was going on, and he reminded me of what God had told me earlier about His faithfulness. People told me that they would give, but nothing. "Maybe they forgot", I thought to myself.

Well I came home that night and was told to do a campaign for people to sign up for a small amount that was more manageable for their budget. It was not working out. For some reason the facebook email was not working. I got angry and then threw down my computer on the bed, then cussed. I realized that I had just sinned with my anger. I asked for forgiveness, and then the worry and stress of the money was gone. I went to sleep that night as peaceful as a quit night. The next day I went to work came home, no emails or PayPal donations. I was sad at first, and then I said, "God, you are in control here." After that I got an email saying, "Chris, did you see my comment on your facebook status? Your PayPal button is not working. I then went to work to see why. Took it off and put another one back on it. Then I got a call from my friend that needed the money, and I just apologized for not getting back to him. He told he was sorry for putting me in that position. I told him that after I looked at my acct. I could help him if he still needed it. Well he told me that he would not refuse it if I were offering. He told me that if he could just get only half of what he has originally asked for. That was not a problem for me. He came over that day and I gave him a check. When he left he told me thank you, and I responded, "no my friend, thank you." He left and the donations just started pouring in. Before I knew it, I was donated over a hundred dollars.

The next day I got an email from one of my good friends saying, "Fish, I have a Five Hundred dollar check here for you." I thought that is what it said. I went just crazy. I was just so happy. I began to tell people about what had just happened. Then Thursday, I went to deposit two checks in my account to cover the checks that I had written to cover my remaining balance for the trip. When I went to open up my buddies check, it was only for a hundred dollars. Ladies and gentlemen, please fold your trays up, and bring your seats to an upright position. I have just entered the panic mode.
I began to panic like never before, so I thought. How was I going to cover my rent, and this too? I began to act out of fear, and not out of faith. After a few emails to Amanda our team leader, and what a leader she is, God began to settle my heart. After the fear of not enough went away, I began to trust again. If God brought me this far, why would He just leave me be?

I left it as is. In His hands. A few more donations came in, leaving me a balance of a little over a hundred dollars. I knew it was going to happen. Then today I got a text from my friend and her husband saying, "Sorry I just got your message from the other day. I just made a donation, and you should have more than enough." "More than enough" she said. So I check my PayPal account. I broke. God is more than enough. I began to shout. I called my friend and just started shouting Glory, Glory, Glory. I called a few more people and did the same thing. I got so excited, that I wanted to put my football pads back on and hit somebody. I was jumping around and dancing that I almost broke something. Oh so good stuff.

I will have to say that God is not enough, but He is more than enough! So now my rent is paid, and my trip is paid for. How awesome is God? The day before I leave, He shows up. Right on time.
During all of this excitement, God began to show me that many times I acted out of fear when I seen that there was no money coming in. I could do nothing but thank Him for His grace. Thank you God that Your faithfulness is greater than our fears.